slowly hearing myself again

{lincoln and sawyer having the most adorable conversation 

while eating their snacks together right after school}

it's the end of the second week of school.
i'm going to attempt to write here in this space while sitting at the desk.
i can pour out my heart through the keyboard easily when i'm sitting on the couch with my legs folded up under me and my laptop on my lap. but it's out of commission (i just can't handle it anymore) and so my option is to not write (not an option!) or to write sitting in a desk chair at our desktop computer. first world problems, i know. but, sadly, it's been quite an ordeal for me in my heart. i was going to "just not write" because "i couldn't", but then decided, "no. i will figure out a way."

so here i am, figuring out a way. you're welcome - ha!

so. end of the second week of school. and i'm FINALLY hearing complete thoughts in my head. i SERIOUSLY don't know how you amazing homeschool moms do it. i loved my summer with my kids. but it.was.crazytown! and for my introverted self, i was just hanging on for dear life until some of them went back to school and i could hear myself think again!

i'm cherishing my mornings with sawyer and levi. they are so sweet (the mornings AND the boys :-)). and i'm ADORING my early afternoons when sawyer is at school and levi is sleeping. and i'm wading my way through the late afternoons and evening...homework and packing lunches and sports and baths and dinner and all.the.stories. and all the "hey, mom"'s! i truly am doing ok with it all because of my mornings and early afternoons.

sawyer is LOVING kindergarten. he is a man of few words. it's hard to get anything out of him. he was "room helper" this week and i had no idea until his FRIEND told me! i did get my first 2 teeny bits of stories from him: 1) 2 boys have wiggly teeth in his class (shared with the MOST awe you can imagine) and 2) there is a girl in his class named "Avery" like the Fogarty's (and he can't name ANY other kids in his class - he's got a handle on their teeth situations, but not quite to their names yet ;-))

everyone else is loving school, too. i think it's going to be a good year for them all. we are SO blessed with amazing schools, administrations, teachers, bus drivers...it's fun to have been in the schools for so many years and to be friends on a first-name basis with them all - from the janitor to the principal!

after not doing any races for a long time...i'm suddenly signed up for 2 in the next 2 months! most people do races to motivate themselves to workout. i don't need that, as we all know. but, these are going to be so much fun! first, a group of us are doing a Tough Mudder race in october. i'm terrified. and hope i don't die. and also equally excited and think it will be super fun...mostly because of the group that is doing it. and second, i'm running a half-marathon. the few races that i have done have all been just to FINISH. but i have a time goal this time - for the first time - so i've added some speedwork into my running routine. it's nice to have a goal to work towards! i want to break 2 hours and i think i'm close enough to it that i should be able to train my legs to run a little bit faster (for 13.1 miles :/)

i've struggled the last 2 weeks with truly getting back to paleo eating. sadly, i don't feel like it's an option for me. i have to eat that way if i want to feel good. but it's tempting to just not. to just eat the cookie. or roll. or whatever. but it builds up in my system...and then i'm a mess. not good. i'm learning. and it's a good process. i don't want to be one of those "crazy people" that are hard to invite over for a meal or whatever. i want to be able to LIVE with it for forever...to make it work for me, and that's what i'm still figuring out.


so, like i said, i'm slowly having complete thoughts. and working my way through piles and inboxes of emails and such all over my house that built up over the summer.

in it all, God is working. and that's the beauty. in the quiet moments. and in the loud, crazy ones. in the endless stories (WHAT is the point here??) and in the hard, "i really need you, mom" hugs they give after a long day. in the laughter and in the tears. in the victories and in the failures. He is working in it all and my heart overflows with thankfulness to Him for letting me be a small part of it with my life.

{and that's the last complete thought i will have today. it's "friend friday"...9 kids here this afternoon while i attempt to make a new dessert recipe to bring to a dinner tonight! :-)}