bright and early monday morning, this amazing little girl got dropped off at my house. it was an emotional day all around...for her mom, for me, for my kids. none of us really knew what it was going to be like, but we all made it and God was so faithful.
one of my biggest prayers is for my kids' hearts. i don't want them to feel like i'm not being the mom they feel like they need. but i also know it's ok for them to sacrifice for others. it's a line i walk in every decision i make every afternoon. as long as i stay close to Him, the answers are clear every time.
i won't ever forget that first afternoon. it was around 3:30 pm. i had made it home from school pickup (it was like 15 degrees or something insane. corey did NOT like the cold :( ) and was done making lunches and helping with homework and corey had been fed and was sitting happily in the swing. i sat down on the ottoman to watch her (and just sit down for a minute!) and sawyer walked over and backed himself right up onto my lap. he talked to me about my day. leaned back and melted into me. as i sat there, and listened, i thought of numerous things i *needed* to get up and do. it took ALL my self-control to STAY. to BE. i told myself, "you will NOT get up until he does. you will NOT push him off your lap." and i made it. it was probably only 10 minutes. and it was a miracle that corey was happy for those 10 minutes and allowed me to do that! i KNOW it was God that allowed for that whole few minutes to happen. i needed it badly. i think sawyer did, too...to know that him mom was still there for him.
basketball practices, basketball games, new diet, chocolate chip cookie making...
it was a HARD week. like, really hard. but God proved Himself faithful once again. in EVERY moment.