a couple days ago i received an email. with a link to 2000 pictures.
these pictures were taken in the orphanage lincoln and levi lived in most of their lives. they were taken by some girls that spent a summer there in 2008.
we weren't allowed to take ANY pictures while we were there. which, at the time, made me sad that we wouldn't have them to show lincoln and levi where they lived. now that i have them, i'm not sure how i feel about them.
regardless, i have close to 50 pictures of lincoln when he was 1 year old. (none of levi...he wasn't born yet!) when he needs a baby picture, i have one. that means a lot to me...and i assume it will to him one day.
i spent the last 2 afternoons going through all the pictures. when i started, i worried that i wouldn't recognize him. ha! it made my heart happy to know i KNEW who he was from the instant i saw him! the shape of his head, the texture of his hair, the shape of his eyes...i know him so much better than i think i do!
but to spend those hours poring over that place. my heart has been heavy...very heavy. to see him there...and know he had 3 MORE YEARS there before we came to get him. crammed 4 kids to a crib. never touching the floor...just standing in the crib all.day..long. ugh. heavy. the conditions there are just so awful. and i can SMELL it as i look at the pictures. that is something i will never forget.
so, a gift, for SURE! i'm SO SO thankful to have the pictures! (i wish i could post one...but they've asked us not to. he's SO cute!! :-)) but also very heavy for the reality that was his life for 4 years.
11 comments:
wow, what a gift. that will be an onion to peel for a long time. like so many things for our blessed babies, bittersweet.
Oh, this makes me so sad. We wanted to adopt a a young girl from that same orphanage almost two years ago. The country closed its doors while we were still gathering paper work. She is 9 years old now. 9 years!! I wish she were here with us.
Got the same email, felt the same way. Made me remember how remarkable our children really are!
Susan Williams
Just wow........what an incredible gift. Thanking God. I so appreciate how that touched the depth of your heart.....a place you have protected now and it was opened. Hold it close Courtney. Pieces....of your boys' past. Precious. Praying for your heart....with love.
that is amazing. so glad you have those.
Wow....a treasure for sure....though our greatest treasures often come with a measure of pain. Well worth the journey.
Wow amazing and heartbreaking at the same time.
Praying for you.
I think that it is so neat that you have these photos. But I can't even imagine how heartbreaking it must be all at the same time! And it will be the same for Lincoln in several years too, i am sure.
Oh my gosh, Courtney!!! That is so awesome to have those pictures!!!! Wow! I dot know what to say except that that is an amazing gift! I'm crying happy and sad tears. Give him extra hugs and kisses!!!!!!!
amazing, that you got them heartbraking at the same time. makes me sad also
they are here know and safe. hugs
wow, so wonderful to receive yet heartbreaking to see... So thankful he is no longer there, but HOME!! Praise God, and hugs to you!!
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