raw

my emotions feel so raw these days.

i can't trust them at all, they swing from extreme to extreme with the smallest change.

all my kids were home today.
i was looking forward to it!

we started out with a "big" breakfast of eggs and toast (compared to our usual bowls of cereal)

then went to the gym and rebekah, joshua and bailey and i all swam while the younger 3 played in the kids club. it was fun...until i went to get dressed and realized my jewelry had been stolen out of my bag. no, i don't lock my locker. i know. it was my "fault." but it made me SO sad. i wear the same jewelry EVERYday - a pair of diamond studs that my parents gave me when i turned 18 in my second holes, a pair of silver balls in my first holes (and i never take any of the earrings out), my watch (that i LOVE. and wanted forever and pat bought me probably 6 years ago) and my necklace with all the kids names on it. my watch and necklace were stolen. they were in a little bag (that i ALSO loved - a gift from a friend) INSIDE my duffel bag. i was sick about it. cried my eyes out. was SO SAD. and then felt wrong for caring so much about "stuff." but, it's not because it was "stuff". sometimes "things" aren't just "things." it was the sentimentality of them. boo.

we had some errands to run after that. bank. prescription picked up. walmart. sams. the day before thanksgiving? fun times! :-)

{dancing in sams with some xbox game...}

when i got home, i had a message from the gym. they found my bag. i went to get it, not expecting anything to be in it.

but my necklace was!!!! {my watch was gone}
i'm SO thankful that whoever "needed" my watch, left my necklace behind! AND the bag!
my sweet kids said they prayed that something would be in it. 
i seriously felt naked (well, maybe not naked, but definitely like something was missing!) without it on for those few hours.

so...during rest time, rebekah, joshua, bailey and i started decorating for christmas.
i normally don't decorate until after thanksgiving.
but it was the PERFECT thing to do this afternoon with them.

and this evening, as i looked at all 6 of my kids.
and their smiles.
i was overcome with thankfulness.


after years of hoping and yearning for our boys to just BE HERE, they are.

life goes on. we all fail each other. stuff happens.

but i don't want all of that to overshadow the beauty and magnitude of that previous sentence...

after YEARS of hoping and yearning 

for our boys to just BE HERE, they are!

SO THANKFUL!!!!!!!