Tuesday, January 5, 2010

joshua

"If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer."
Matthew 21:22

on any given day i am especially burdened for one of my children in particular.
sometimes it just lasts a day.
sometimes a week.
sometimes a year...

lately it's been joshua.
i am just having a hard time "connecting" with him.
i look for ways to engage him.
things to ask him.
but it's hard work...lots of my brain and heart invested.

and i feel like it's still not happening.

i prayed a simple, expectant prayer this morning.
mostly because i didn't know what else to do.
"Lord, I expect to connect with Joshua today.
To see his REAL smile and a piece of his heart.
Thank you for answering the desires of my heart."

and He did.
a number of times.
in very small but real ways.
someone watching might not have even noticed it.
but i did.
to me it was huge.

and once again i'm awed and humbled by the sweet love of my Father.

6 comments:

beckley said...

thank you for caring so much about your children.

may this continue to unfold.

shalom,
r

Ali said...

Praise Him! So glad you could see it. I know it's been heavy on your heart. This is a good challenge for me, to think a little smaller and just ask daily instead of expect an instant change.

Beckysblog said...

I have real fears for trying to 'get' Sully when he is older.
This was an awesome post!

Unknown said...

Courtney and Patrick – Congratulations on your impending adoptions, and on your beautiful family as it exists now. Best wishes for a happy (and eventful!) 2010.

Your cousin in South Boston

Christy said...

so sweet...

Tammy said...

you are such a wonderful mother. i don't know why i am always amazed when God answers prayer. i love how you pray expectant prayers.