that's how i feel today. i told myself going into this week that the weather didn't matter - i knew it would be "iffy" - but it's making me frustrated. and the kids also. joshua is just plain ticked at the fact that we can't play on the beach like he's known in the past.
played in the pool this morning. pat and i both ran. the girls did our nails. we're trying to figure out our plan for this evening.
we're still loving being together. i'm not losing sight of that. i just would love some warm, sunny weather.
anyways, my heart is frustrated. spending all this time focused on each other makes you realize the good...and the bad. and i'm frustrated with the ugly things i see in each kid - and realize where i'm failing as a mom. i came into this week with a list in my head of "real" things i wanted to talk to Pat about - and we just don't seem to get the chance even though we're together all day. frustrating. and vacation always tends to leave me frustrated anyways. this is going to sound crazy, i know. but when you're on vacation, you don't go to bed at a decent hour, yet the kids wake up early - so you're tired. you don't eat well - so you feel like crap. and you are just focused on "fun" - so you tend to forget about reading the Word and focusing on what's really important.
i'm trying to not do all those things - we have fruit in the fridge. we're doing a devotion together each day. we're exercising some. it just feels like a struggle to stay "on track" in so many areas.
i don't really know what i'm saying. i'm just frustrated today. it's probably mostly hormones (always my excuse these days) and i'll feel totally fine 2 hours from now.
i did love the reminder from Buddy today - of the most important commandments....
"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength."
3 comments:
Oh sweet Courtney hugs from Hungary!!!
This past summer I was at my mom's and the pastor at the church we went to had just returned from vacation and he said people were asking him "how was vacation? Was it great?" And he said "Actually it isn't. He and his family pack up to go to a hotel for a week, they are on different schedules and different routines and it takes so much effort to just figure out how each day will look, and did you bring enough diapers, food, clothes etc.." He said many of the same things you did and he basically ended saying he needs a vacation from his vacation. Everything he said was so true and everyone was laughing so hard.
You aren't alone. Hungarians (well Europeans) all think vacation is RIGHT not a privledge like in America, so they always ask "where are you going for vacation this year?" We told them no where this summer because we will be at our english camps for 5 weeks and being home will feel like a vacation...and they don't understand how we will be happy to just sit and take walks around our neighborhood!!!
Hang in there and enjoy your kids and PAT!!!! You ARE a good mom and remember that! Our kids are just the most precious little sinners we know! And that is what they are...sinners, and we love them! Isn't that amazing...
anyway, I have "talked" too much. love you friend!
i often feel this way about our vacations too. it is good to get away but often i hold such high expectations and then when just one thing (a big or little thing) doesn't go MY way, then i am frustrated. hang in there...it is good to get away but hard to be cooped up and out of "the routine" when the weather is bad in a hotel room. i hope that you and pat have a chance to talk and relax some! at least you all are healthy and all the yucky germs in your house will have had a chance to die by the time you return home! :)
You are totally right about the stressful part of vacations! I wondered if the kids would be frustrated with the weather...being that most of your vacations are beach ones right in the heart of summer. You're getting to do so many fun DIFFERENT things...I know it's not a VACATION for you though - moms never get a day off. But yes, your hormones are playing with you too. Your kids are making WONDERFUL memories. You are an AMAZING mother. These devotions from Buddy are wonderful, and that you have committed to posting them is a great testimony to him. You are amazing!
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